Today's posting comes from Pennsylvania and may be the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen. Per usual, the link to the actual GFM page is at the bottom of this posting, and as always, I will give you a small summary.
Carrie is going through a midlife crisis. She is finishing her PhD, working too hard, being a mom, running a photography business and just really wants to do something CRAZY for herself! Her bucket list includes two things: raising money online and getting a squirrel tattoo. (I have to throw in that in my opinion, that is the dullest bucket list anyone has ever come up with. However, none of my business!) In Carrie's words, the tattoo is "a masterpiece of creativity and BA-ness as a trophy of my own uniqueness, perseverance and a 3 second attention span". She really doesn't want to use "'family money" so she needs to raise $2000 for the tattoo, tip, and for the snacks that she likes to bring to her sessions. These include purple gatorade and pretzels! I wonder if pretzel is code word for narcotic?
But DON'T WORRY, she is covering her own gas and mileage :)
Oh. Good. Fucking. Lord. I had to read this several times to ensure it wasn't a troll asking for money. Nope, 100% real. Carrie's just sort of fucked up. That's all.
Disclaimer: Everything here is written solely for entertainment purposes. In no way am I putting down anyone that chooses to tattoo their body. Some of my best friends are tattooed all over and I love them the same as if they weren't tatted up. Your body, your prerogative. Everyone values art in different ways and that makes the world a better place. However, don't ask the general public for $2,000 for your shitty squirrel and fucking pretzels.
I am troubled where to start with my new fucked up friend Carrie. $615 of her $2000 goal has been met. I'd like to meet some of these dumbasses. I just don't get it.
When it comes to financials, Carrie doesn't want to use family money for her tattoo. Why? You want to do something crazy for yourself, your family should support you. You say you work hard, why can't you afford your own shitty tattoo? Or at least your own bottle of purple gatorade? Do you really need those pretzels? I went to the grocery yesterday and purposely bought a bag of pretzels for myself, simply because it means one less bag of pretzels for you. Buy your own fucking pretzels.
What made you decide on a squirrel? You said it's a masterpiece of creativity, but I don't get it. I ran over a squirrel with my bike the other day. Didn't look like that much of a masterpiece to me. Do you remember the scene from Disney's Sword in the Stone? When Merlin and the kid turn into squirrels? ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cMp-RgIPT0 ) If you got a tattoo of the fat old lady squirrel that doesn't know how to talk, and you put it on your ass, I might be on board with this "creativity" boat. But I'm not, because it's a shitty way to use $2,000.
Carrie wants us to know that if we donate $50 or more, we get access to a private Facebook group and a signed photograph of her finished squirrel tattoo................
Who the fuck gave this woman a PhD? I wouldn't pay 3 cents for a picture of said shitty tattoo.
I'm at a loss for words. Carrie's idea of a "creative masterpiece" has killed my own creativity, as I simply have no hope for the human race. Carrie, your tattoo and pretzels/narcotics aren't worth $2,000. My last comment on it? Use your own fucking money. Cheers babe xo
P.S. Here is a picture of her almost finished tattoo. I saved you all $50. You can forge your own signature any way you want.
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ReplyDeleteBefore you judge someone else, you might want to consider your own issues that are causing you to become so enraged by someone else's harmless crowdfunding campaign that has absolutely no bearing on your life whatsoever. Life is too short to expend all of this negative energy. I find it hard to believe at the time you posted this that my GoFundMe was the most ridiculous thing you had ever seen on the internet. I mean, there are some really crazy things out there. And, even though it is absolutely none of your business, all of the people who have funded this campaign (with the exception of one stranger who donated after your article was posted), all of the donors were personal friends of mine who wanted a fun way to gift me or tip me for my photography services. So, keep on judging others if it makes you feel better, but know that it makes you sound like a complete douchebag. Thanks for the share!
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